Well, here I go, gettin’ my Usher on.
It’s a little after 6am. I wasn’t able to sleep last night. It is what it is.
1. While in some ways I love (now, at least) that my parents left me clueless as to how the real world was, I find myself more frustrated with the way I’ve had to learn everything the hard way. I feel that they could’ve prepared me a LOT more, but I’m learning now and that’s what counts.
2. I hate that my kids are far away from me. Hate it. It eats me alive. But on that note, I’ve seen first hand what it does to a kid to get bounced around often. It makes me grateful that my kids have the consistency they do. They adjust far better and are much happier.
3. I hate that I’m judged for not having my kids 24/7, despite others not knowing the full story. However, I expect the judgement because while I tried to keep things between my ex and I, he didn’t feel that was necessary and told his side to everyone that listened. Only 2 or 3 people know exactly what happened, and it’ll stay that way.
4. I still haven’t been back to see a doctor about myself. I know, I KNOW. Irresponsible. Ridiculous. Insane. I know I need to go, but our insurance doesn’t cover much. Plus, the idea that my whole world could shift from right under me is terrifying.
5. I’m a movie junkie. Of all kinds.
6. I watch the tv show FRIENDS entirely too much. I’m not even sorry.
7. My best friend and I don’t live near each other. We can go months without speaking two words to one another. But when we start speaking again, we pick up where we left off. It’s a miracle we’re still friends, but that’s only because of our personalities.
8. It scares me sometimes how much I love my husband. I’m not scared of love. I’m scared of waking up one day and not having it there with me.
9. I enjoy blogging. A lot. But I hardly have anything to blog about. My life is really, REALLY uneventful. Well, last year was full of dark times and walking through fire, but it’s not something I think I’ll put here. Not at this moment, anyway.
10. Photography is *the* dream. I’m not sure I’ll ever pursue it, though.